What does poop taste like?
I didn't know what poop tastes like, and I don't really WANT to know, either. But a guy named Gibbletwunt has told me, so now, I'll share his inspiring story with you:
When I was seven, my dad uncovered our family’s sewage system. There was some kind of blockage somewhere, so part of our backyard had an open channel full of poop and pee leading to the now uncovered septic tank, which was obviously also full of poop and pee.
My mates would occasionally come to my house for an A-Team episode re-enactment (it was 1987!). During one of these, I outran the bad guys and performed an impressive army-roll. Then I plunged head-first into the septic tank.
Your first instinct when you fall into water, or as in this instance, poopy pee-ey turd jam, is to breathe IN. Deeply. Which I did. I must have swallowed about three grumpies and was almost drowning in my own family's effluent when I was fished out by my dad.
So today, I have a vivid memory of what poo tastes like. I can assure you that it's not pleasant. It doesn't really taste like chicken. It's slightly alkaline and has chunks in it.
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